Set Back

Frustration just isn't a strong enough word to describe how I am feeling. I posted yesterday morning that Ella was better, her episode had ended (Tuesday - Friday). At least that is what I had thought. She had a great day for the most part but then at 4 p.m. she suddenly looked like she had just been deflated completely. She was laying around, no energy and then I took her temperature -100.6 then an hour later 101.4. She was complaining of a headache and fell asleep on the couch. At about 5:30 she began vomiting. She threw-up about 3 times and that was it. She felt better, no more fever, energy returned.

This morning I took her to the doctor. Usual tests were run. Negative on all of them. I am just numb. I literally could be punched and wouldn't feel it. I am confused, heartbroken, scared, sad.  I just want our normal life back. I didn't think vomiting was a classic symptom of pfapa? Did she have something else?  Our appointment with the infectious disease doctor can't get here soon enough. Again, please pray for Ella. For all of us - I feel my strength and my energy is lessening. Ella's dad has reached his limit as well.

My devotional really hit home today.


Our life circumstances can change in an instant. A car crash, a fire, a diagnosis: it doesn’t take much to make us feel like we’ve gone from a life of blessing to a life filled with trials. Our Daily Bread reminds us that despite our circumstances, God deserves our gratitude:

Actor Christopher Reeve was paralyzed in a horseback riding accident in 1995. Prior to this tragedy, he had played the part of a paraplegic in a movie. In preparation, Reeve visited a rehabilitation facility. He recalled: “Every time I left that rehab center, I said, ‘Thank God that’s not me.’” After his accident, Reeve regretted that statement: “I was so setting myself apart from those people who were suffering without realizing that in a second that could be me.” And sadly, for him, it was. 

We too may look at the troubles of others and think that it could never happen to us. Especially if our life journey has led to a measure of success, financial security, and family harmony. In a moment of vanity and self-sufficiency, King David admitted to falling into the trap of feeling invulnerable: “Now in my prosperity I said, ‘I shall never be moved’” (Ps. 30:6). But David quickly caught himself and redirected his heart away from self-sufficiency. He remembered that he had known adversity in the past and God had delivered him: “You have turned for me my mourning into dancing” (v.11).